A New Technical Term and Other Business

To describe a procedure where we vary the location of an antenna to attempt to either average out the effects of multipath or remove it altogether, we’ve started talking about jiggle. There have been whole conversations whose verb and noun make use of that word. Teleconferences where engineers with 10, 20, 30+ year experiences are throwing that word around. And so, I must concede that jiggle is indeed now a technical term.

In other news, it looks like my energy level is down. Instead of going out Tuesday night, I stayed at home relaxing, reading, and watching anime. I figured that would be a good way to recharge me - WRONG. All day today (keep in mind that I overslept), I’ve been tired, listless. Food has not changed it - so it’s more of mental thing than physical. I want to go home and just sit down and read but I feel obligated to stay here and put in some more hours (it’s pretty much my last week).

It’s funny, I’ve been trying to cure Nate of his feelings of obligation to places that don’t deserve it (or probably even care) and yet I’m here doing the same thing. Classes start next week and I’m a TA this year, so I’m going to need to up the energy level and soon.

I think I really need to define a research path for myself and soon. Writing this post has triggered a chain of thoughts whose conclusion is that I’m starting to lose my motivation again.

The Newest Insult to Hit the Streets!

You arugula eating, soca berry drinking, peanut infused oatmeal-granola health bar chomping, three day a week gym exercising, people of the world love engendering, multicultural, non-conformist.

Seriously, all the kids are already joaning on each other using those words. I know I’m out of the game. But if you even come back to me with a word that relates thirteen and pastries, I’d be forced to call you a greyhead.

Just letting you know.

The run your car on water hoax

I know I should not get worked up over this and mostly I don’t. However, every once in a while, I happen to stumble across an ad for some website that is bilking people out of their money or see some article somewhere and for some reason, it just raises my ire.

I suppose I have an above average understanding of chemistry and physics, but I’m really disappointed that the US education system is not apparently good enough that most people can see this for what it is. Unlike other scams which prey on your emotions, greed, and naivety, this one specifically targets your logic!

First, they attempt to convince you that there is some special “brown’s gas” aka HHO that is somehow different from H2O that is produced. Second, they attempt to argue that you can get MORE energy out of turning H2O into HHO than you waste in breaking it!! However, that is a pretty hard pill to swallow even with the (apparently) crappy education system that we have, so they attempt to tie in all sorts of anecdotal “evidence” and phenomena to show that it would work.

Some places claim to use sonic vibrations at the resonant frequency of H2O bonds to break them at very low energy. Why they say it works. . . uh because opera singers have been known to shatter glass with their voice. Umm. . . first - they shattered very special glasses - wine glasses whose composition differs from other run of the mill drinking ones. Also, the wine glasses used typically have a minute imperfection, not on the order of VVS in diamonds (ie, you could probably see the imperfection without needed 10x magnification), but something that if you held up the glass to show someone in front of you or over a tv camera, nobody would really notice.

And that’s just the beginning. Then, they claim results which are never EVER scientifically substantiated or are even reproducible. In EVERY SINGLE test ever conducted (under legal duress - ie, someone got sued for selling a fake product), somehow, it always failed. Of course, the whole industry operates under a huge conspiracy umbrella, that big oil, congress, your grandmother, and little Timmy down the street are all out to get them and foil everything they do.

Then, there are the testimonials where people claim to have improved their gas mileage by <= 10mpg. Hmm, that is NOT hard to do at all. Proper tire inflation, engine tune ups, all sorts of things which are probably happening behind the scenes. The biggest one is playing around with the oxygen and Mass Air Flow sensors on the car. Again, perhaps I have above average knowledge of how modern engines work, but it doesn’t require a genius to understand that if I screw with how much air the engine thinks it is getting, it will inject less fuel.

So, in the short term, you get better gas mileage. Long term, you’d probably need to replace your engine at some point due to the damage it’s accumulating. . . then I suppose you’d have to see if the $$ you saved compares to the cost of replacing the engine. . .or car.

Of course, each and every one of those systems violates a fundamental rule of thermodynamics - namely that energy cannot be created nor destroyed. They do it in numerous ways, but the easiest one to demonstrate (textually) is the claim that the water (fuel in this hoax) gets converted BACK TO WATER when done. So, you’re telling me that the fuel I burn to run my car. . . get’s returned to me.

Nobody expects the gasoline that is burned in the engine to come back out. That is plain foolishness. People almost understand why that doesn’t happen. So, why do you believe someone when they tell you that the water that powers this system gets recirculated back?

And seriously people, name ONE product EVER mass marketed and used that the science of the day unanimously said was impossible. ONE!

Would “they” change the White House to the Black House?

I’ve not noticed these kind of sentiments and statements lately, though that does not mean they are gone. Perhaps the focus is on more things like how the McCain camp can’t help but acknowledge that people seem to like Barack a lot more than they do John as they attempt to portray him as nothing more than a ditsy celebrity despite that the two they chose are likely the worst that anyone would attempt to project qualities from onto Obama.

Perhaps though, that was playing it safe. Well. . . I can’t imagine they’d have an easy time getting many black actors/actresses or other personalities to appear in the ad. Wow, I just realized this. . . that Paris Hilton and Britney Spears may have been their only available choices.

But that aside, I started saying that maybe they were playing it safe because featuring a Kanye West for example may trigger some rumbling of attempting to portray Obama as an “angry black man”. Not that I’m saying Kanye West is an “angry black man”.

In any case, this post though is about speculation than an Obama presidency would actually change the name of the White House to “Black House” - pure bullshit, that pork-n-beans and chitlins would be served at the White House (I assume dinners with foreign dignitaries is the implication), and other such “blackification” [to coin a phrase] of the White House.

Now, aside from the ludicrous, what’s actually wrong with any of those things? The White House is the residence of the sitting POTUS. It is his (and his family’s) prerogative to institute whatever types of foods, drapes, bedsheets, portraits, rituals, and anything else they want - within reason and maintaining the decorum that befits someone representing the executive might of the United States.

Anxiety over these things is more than just worry that Obama will somehow sully the presidency. It speaks to a disconnect with and scorn for aspects of black “culture”.

Ahh, Finally a relaxing week

Despite the fact that it is 12:30AM and I’m at work (I took a few hours off between 10 and 12 to goto my Tuesday night hangout - the Shadow Lounge), this is still a pretty relaxed week. Yes, there is some work to be done on my car, but nothing approaching the amount or intensity of any weekend in the previous two months.

I can now actually get out again and do stuff. . . or go places and not do stuff if I so desire. Perhaps it was the alcohol, or perhaps it was the affirmation, but I feel really good right now. Let me explain:

Tuesday nights at Shadow Lounge is open-mic night. I’ve gone up a couple times to share things and this week, during the break, I made an effort to go and chat with a couple people (after first talking with the chick who seemed to be eyeing me when I first came in). Anyway, someone told me that they liked my presentation from last week.

I was floored because frankly I feel that most people who come up are on a much different level than I. Even with that in the back of my head, I still felt good hearing that. Hopefully, this keeps up through next week when I’ll do a more or less finalized version of this.

Tonight, I also again put the car through some paces. . . whew, I’m falling in love all over again! This is a good thing. I already know that events such as accidents or major failure tends to alienate people from their cars and they usually end up selling it once it’s fixed. I’m glad that I still have the same enthusiasm for it. One thing that helps is that the car is, as my cousin put it on Saturday, “timeless”. I just love the look and can see myself with it for a long time. Having 50 more HP doesn’t hurt either

I’ve always felt that I could do well enough without having others to validate me. Certainly, that is a trait necessary for survival in a small company or research lab. But validation definitely has its good sides. Even though I’ve got a minimum of three more hours of work before I leave to catch some Zzzs, I feel really hyped to get my work done.

I think this is how I envisioned my entire summer experience. I’d work reasonable hours and be relaxed enough to enjoy it, even when doing boring things. Now, my goal is to attempt to replicate this zen-like feeling during the school year. I talked with a TLH friend online this evening and he mentioned leaving to go play volleyball. I definitely reminded me of the big sports void in my life. I’d love to get back into a volleyball and/or soccer league. That will definitely be on my calendar this fall semester!

It’s Alive!!

After a month and a half of spending whole weekends fixing my car, not to mention week days working full time while attempt to track down parts and negotiate good prices, the car finally runs!

There are still some issues:

• Need an auxiliary fan to keep the engine from overheating in slow city traffic.
• Need to figure out how to fix the driver’s side window
• Need to get the ABS working
• Exhaust work needs to be done (this week).
• Buy and install AC compressor
• Swap suspension for stock 6cyl stuff
• Clean up car.

Aside from that, it runs pretty well. The extra 50hp shows up everywhere. It’s very noticeable in the low and high range. 1st and 2nd gear barely exist the car goes through them so fast and it’s a lot more torquey in 5th. 3rd and 4th feel the same, though the car is likely a lot faster there as well.

The good news is that now my weekends are back to being rest and relax. . . I suppose installing AC compressors is relaxing compared to my previous weekends But having this done makes a big difference. I can focus more at work and spend less hours there since I won’t be distracted with looking up stuff for the car. This will also free up my week nights for relaxing as well. Rather than the work/sleep/repeat grind.

The other good thing about having my wheels running is that I can now go out again. That part of my life has been on hold for the past month and a half as well. I wonder if the haitus has been good for me. I’ve certainly started thinking that I want to explore other places than just the SouthSide. I feel like I’ve hit saturation on the demographic of people I’m going to meet there. I need someplace with different kinds of people.

It’ll take some time. One reason I’ve stuck with the SouthSide is Tiki Lounge. There was something about that place that attracted me and is very comfortable for me. I’m pretty much a regular there, friends with the bartenders, waved in by the bouncers, etc. Even acquaintances of mine seem to know that the Tiki Lounge is “my spot”.

Still, I’m tired. Time to sleep tonight. Will need to spend several hours tomorrow cleaning the apartment and car.

I Can Fall in Love All By Myself

I’ve heard this song handlebars by Flobots and there is something about it that really vibes with me at this time. The link is to the official music video which is pretty cool. There’s also plenty of other fan made ones on youtube which are pretty nice as well. I definitely like the way other people have chosen to interpret the song and convey the meaning behind the words and music. I must say though this video for the song is also pretty powerful.

Hmm, there is an itching sensation in my palms. Typically, that’s nervous energy but it also comes about when there is some exciting thought or plan bubbling beneath the surface. I think I may be inspired to write a bit later today. It’s been a while

Strangely enough, despite everything that has happened, I’m still infatuated with HEC though at the moment I’m still clopping around on eggshells. Though speaking of this, I’m starting to think I need a change of venues for when I go out. Not that I’ve really gone or done anything in the past month while my car has been out of commission, but perhaps I need to give the Southside a bit of a rest.

Even writing this is off topic - there is no real coherent topic of this post. So, don’t be further surprised as I bounce from one thought to the next.

So, yesterday I had a conversation with a good friend of mine. In talking, aside from two other people, I’ve made less than a handful of friends since I’ve been here in Pittsburgh with a good percentage being bartenders. Furthermore, none of these have gotten to the can call at 3am in the morning to bail me out of jail or drive 3 hours somewhere to help me stage (not that I’ll ever have a need to be bailed out of jail). The reason that even came up is that the one friend I have in that capacity will be shortly moving several hours away to start a new job.

I’m not necessarily bemoaning not having such type friends here, it’s just it reminded me of how rare it is to have really good friends. Makes me want to make a trip to TLH to visit sometime before the fall semester begins.

Alert! Alert! Burnout Emminent

It was no accident or laziness that made me decide as early as January that this summer was supposed to be a summer to chillax. By that, I mean not working more than 30 hours a week, spending several hours a day on my couch or in Schenley park reading (a fiction) book. Perhaps a couple hours on the odd weekend working on some issue related to my car.

So, now that I find myself spending most of my weekends fixing my car and pushing 40-60 hour work weeks (I only bill 40 because I spend time during the day thinking/planning/buying/etc related to fixing my car).

I’d planned to drive to DC to visit family for the July 4th weekend. However, due to several issues - the most annoying one being that it’s almost been a month and the guy I bought the motor from has sent me everything except one module. I can get the car running w/o it, however, having it saves me ~$150 which is plenty of money in my current state.

So, I’ve spent all of today (and a couple hours after writing this) working on the car. After this point, it should be 6-8 hours away from starting and running (assuming I either get that EWS module or take it to a dealership for realignment).

However, today, even though I worked with my usual. . .uh. . .tenacity? Bah, I’m too tired to think of the word I want - I started to get to the point where fixing the car became a chore. Work has almost gotten to that point which signals to me that I’m approaching the burnout point. I hope this weekend will be enough to recharge my batteries.

Even though I know I’ll be extremely excited and happy once this is done, I no longer feel the joy of getting more work done and this bothers me a lot. I still find work to be interesting and fun. Hopefully that continues until I’m done with the car and can start to catch up on cool down periods.

This was Supposed to Be

My summer to relax. My summer to recover. My summer where I did not work very hard. Then several things happened. However, the car break down is probably the worst, in that it drains all my spare cash and time. Now I work 40-50 hours a week, admittedly on a job I like, then spend about another 20+ on the weekends fixing the car.

The cost of fixing the car means that I’m not going to be able to relax my working schedule for the entire summer. I suppose that within two weeks, I’d at least have reclaimed my weekends and being able to drive to and from work will net me a bit more time to sleep or at least give me more flexibility to work when I feel motivate rather than having to structure my time around a fixed bus schedule.

This post though is prompted by me feeling immensely tired and listless at the moment. Perhaps I should just take an hour or two to sit and read, then come back and continue working. I guess I’m worried that tomorrow afternoon, this feeling of ennui will return and cause me not to get as much work done on the car as I’d like. Then the process of having it up and running would be delayed even further.

Perhaps I’m just lazy. I can’t help but think of other people who work longer hours than I do and they don’t complain. Or maybe this is my unconscious attempting to test my resolve to stay in grad school. If so, I’d wish it’ll stop.

The VSB Post I Never Wrote

Hmm. I’ve been thinking about some things that have come up in the past couple days. I’m not sure if I should post this on VSB. In fact, I’ve decided not to post it. Perhaps I’m way off. But while I’d like to get a lot more feedback on this than posting it here would garner, I don’t quite feel its ready for a bigger audience. Perhaps I’m still feeling out my thoughts on this and don’t think it’s finished. Or perhaps I don’t want to ignite something or further shade the way people interpret my posts on that site. I’ve always known that people color what they read based on their perception of the person saying it. So, I usually attempt to present myself as neutrally as possible though for the most part I’ve not made any attempt to disgender the kamakula personality. Anyway, no more prefacing . . .

Black Nationalism (BN) to me is a response to the feeling that the best things can become is separate but equal. That while black peope may be able to wrest equal rights and treatment out of the government of the USA, blacks will never be accepted as equals. I feel this is a fundamental basis for BN and feel that this is flawed. Therefore, any further deductions will also be flawed though more or less self-consistent. I think it’s critical for some to realize that a flawed argument can still be self-consistent. Everything will hold together, it’s just an underlying assumption that would be shown to be wrong. Perhaps that’s what makes it hard to address those who are in the BN camp.

There are some who approach the argument (or perhaps another one altogether) from the point of preservation of black culture. I think I can make the argument that it’s a pretty big stretch to say that there is a black culture (or white culture) in the United States. When I think of culture, I think of something uniquely defined by language, religion, art, literature, customs, modes of behavior, and physical locality. If two groups of people have several of these things in common, I’d be hard pressed to say that they are different cultures.

Now, before I continue, let me get a dictionary definition of culture. This is the defintion of the sense of the word from merriam-webster:

5 a: the integrated pattern of human knowledge, belief, and behavior that depends upon the capacity for learning and transmitting knowledge to succeeding generations b: the customary beliefs, social forms, and material traits of a racial, religious, or social group; also : the characteristic features of everyday existence (as diversions or a way of life} shared by people in a place or time <popular culture> <southern culture> c: the set of shared attitudes, values, goals, and practices that characterizes an institution or organization <a corporate culture focused on the bottom line> d: the set of values, conventions, or social practices associated with a particular field, activity, or societal characteristic <studying the effect of computers on print culture>

Black people don’t have a unique language or different language from the rest of the country. Black people don’t live in a different region of the country than everyone else. In fact, if I try to pin down the ways in which blacks as a people are different from the rest of the country, I’m left with just looks, the shared history of being oppressed by slavery/racism and the hiphop/rap music subculture. The remaining differences - art, other areas of music, and possibly behavior - I believe stem from regional variations and are not strong enough to stand on their own as a basis for identifying a separate culture.

So, in the context of my belief that our country is moving towards a more or less unified state where race does not matter, it would seem to me that not only does a black culture not really exist, but the natural progression of things will ensure that one does not emerge. The forces that push black people together into one group for common survival, interaction, and general enjoyment of life.

Yet, there is a flaw in my argument. Black people definitely look different from the rest of the country and while we’re attempting to minimize the effect of race on society, that is a strong cultural indicator. I don’t think that the context in which I frame this argument is strong enough to overcome this. I’m not sure it should.